The Official Hog Blog
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Oh the things that I could do.....
Monday, May 29, 2006
Friday, May 26, 2006
As a fanatic for collectable records, the reports that vinyl is selling more and more these days is encouraging. I've been wondering how long it would take for this sort of resurgence. Hooray!
Thursday, May 18, 2006
Not Ready to Give Up the Ghost
A new ghost has settled into my home. His baudy jokes and barroom joviality are haunting me. His laughter is that of a pirate's, with a Har Har Har. His accent is like WC Fields. He checks out the dames and he drinks plenty of scotch. Pointing to the bed, he'll remind you that's a great place to pork yer old lady. He's prone to calling the shots as he sees 'em, even when they aint the best of words. He's ready to shoot his gun, both barrels blazing. He'll lift you up just to bring you right back down. He's already in my heart, and he's trying to tear me apart.
I've heard him the most when guests arrive. He joins in on conversations and I'll answer him, hoping that each word syncs up with whatever anyone else is talking about. Its not too bad, in fact, most of my friends think nothing of what I say.
He sits right down and asks for a beer.
Give it to me in that icy cold stein, hog!
he calls out as I tip toe into the kitchen, pretending not to hear him. I make casual conversation with my guests, as the ghost looks at me incredulously.
HOG! I was talking with you, my man!
he shouts at me, and only I can hear him. I have to smile as he does this, so as to not give away his intrusions. I'm right here in front of you! Don't you hear me?
Oh, why wont you let me be? When will you join the souls who have gone before you? Must you continue to haunt me?
Again, he laughs and points his fingers out to me.
This too shall pass, he reminds me, for nothing shall not.
Monday, May 15, 2006
Marty Nine doesn't talk much out loud or otherwise. He grunts and snorts, instead of making coherent sentences. A quick nod, shrug, or a turn of the head serves the purpose most every day of the week. His single testicled dog, Muddy, is his only companionship in this world, which doesnt count the many hours Nine will spend reading or looking at pornography.
Wednesday, May 03, 2006
i wake up before 5am,
shower if I need to and make a large cup of mud.
yes, its a sissy drink. its a soy latte, but its a strong one.
while the water boils and turns into espresso, i dont have much time that early in the morning, so i work three things at one time. pull my clothes on, check the time, brush my teeth and look at the news all in the span of ten minutes. by 505 am, the coffee is ready and i can ease down in front of the computer to play a couple of hands of online poker while i wake up. afterwards i get together a sandwich for lunch. today it was a salami sammich with lettuce, tomatoes, onions, provolone and mustard. i try to do it in a quiet way so as to not wake anyone else in the building. i remember how precious those early morning sleepytime hours are. i respect that. usually, a guy on the first floor is already up, hacking and coughing. he's a old guy who has been smoking for longer than i been living, and he sounds like he's gonna die soon. around 520am, i slip into the bedroom and kiss my girl on the cheek, tell her i love her and say g'bye before pulling my big, clunky work boots over my feet and head out into the dark world.
my truck is usually nearby, so i dont have to walk far. i turn on the radio to an npr station and warm up the engine, still sipping my coffee. [bad news on the radio, and later i find out that the same news is repeated on commercial stations, even on the republican talk radio stations. makes me believe we all get the same bad news in the same fashion.] the drive to work is 38 minutes long, and as soon as i get to the warehouse, i tie my boots up, having left them untied up to that point, and look around for the days work orders to be put together and delivered. once the orders are together i head out on the highway. by that time, the sun has risen and the coffee has taken effect. i finally feel awake.
